April Betting Masters - 173

BM - 173..All welcome, show the BBS who the best punter is; don't delay join today

Updated OoM

Finbar 17
=============
Louis 14
PoolKing 8
Stigma 8
3 Beers at HT 7
StuNick 5
Funk Butter 5

Previous winners:

1: el mico
2: three-way 0-0-0 final draw !!!(Plugster, late mail and odds against)
3: Finbar
4: Grim Reaper
5: EagleSE24
6: LLCOOLSTEVE
7: Stigma
8: Stigma
9: Stigma
10: Tor
11: Finbar
12: Finbar
13: old git
----------------------------
Overall best betting in 2004: Stigma
----------------------------
14. Reps AJ
15. bradley eagle
16. Tor
17. LLCOOLSTEVE
18. stevejfh
19. Tor
20. Finbar
21. Drunk eagle
22. Ozeagle
23. LLCOOLSTEVE
24. Wildcat Army
25. LLCOOLSTEVE
----------------------------
Overall best better in 2005: stevejfh
----------------------------
26: si1965
27: Ozeagle
28: srs9jps
29. si1965
30: hakers
31: Tor (WC '06)
32: srs9jps
33: NO1FAN
34: Drunk eagle
35: Stigma
36: Stigma
37: DedBallSpeshlst
-----------------------------
Overall best better in 2006: Flat Noodle
-----------------------------
38: LLCOOLSTEVE
39: Finbar
40: richdeniro
41: Stigma
Champions league winner 06/07: Ian Hart
UEFA Cup winner 06/07: Gav The Hamster
42: Finbar
43: Funk Butter
44: PoolKing
45: Funk Butter
46: Drunk Eagle
47: StuNick
48: Stigma
49: StuNick
Champions league winner 07/08-1: Finbar
UEFA Cup winner 07/08-1: Gav The Hamster
-----------------------------
Overall best better in 2007: Finbar
-----------------------------
50: GodstoneEagle
51: Funk Butter
52: Finbar
53: Funk Butter
54: LLCOOLSTEVE
55: Al From Bromley
56: Stigma
2008 Olympics: pauldrulez
57: pauldrulez
58: NO1FAN
59: Al From Bromley
60: Drunk Eagle
-----------------------------
Overall best better in 2008: StuNick
-----------------------------
61: StuNick
62: ardeo
63: Stigma
64: LLCOOLSTEVE
65: Finbar
66: No1Fan
67: Al From Bromley
68: Al From Bromley
69: Funk Butter
70: DedBallSpeshlst
71: Kayjay
72: Gooders
73: gjohnk
-----------------------------
Overall best better in 2009: Funk Butter
-----------------------------
74: Finbar
75: StuNick
76: DedBallSpeshlst
77: Swanny32
78: Funk Butter
79: Funk Butter
80: gjohnk
81: Finbar
82: MynamenisnotMax
83: No1Fan
84: gjohnk
85: Little Fozzie
-----------------------------
World Cup 2010 winner: old git
Overall best better in 2010: ?????
-----------------------------
86: Flat Noodle
87: Finbar
88: GodstoneEagle
89: Flat Noodle
90: mynameisnotmax
91: Louis
92: Funk Butter
93: gjohnk
94: DedBallSpeshlst
95: Stigma
96: cantspell
97: No1Fan
========================
2011 Order of Merit Winner: Finbar
========================

March 100th edition knockout special: Little Fozzie
Champions league winner 1st half 2011: Finbar
Champions league winner 2nd half 2011: StuNick
Jan - May UEFA Cup winner 2011: StuNick
Aug - Dec UEFA Cup winner 2011: Housey100

98: 3 Beers at HT
99: StuNick
100: cantspell
101: Funk Butter
102: Finbar
103: Swanny32
104: Funk Butter
105: Louis
106: srs9jps
107: Funk Butter
108: LLCOOLSTEVE
109: Funk Butter
========================
2012 Order of Merit Winner: Funk Butter

August - Dec 2012 Champions League winner: Swanny32
August - Dec 2012 UEFA Cup winner: JamTheEagle

Jan - May 2012 Champions League winner: No1Fan
Jan - May 2012 UEFA Cup winner: Ian Hart
========================
110: Louis
111: Louis
112: Gooders
113: Finbar
114: Little Fozzie
115: StuNick
116: Flat Noodle
117: Louis
118: evvo111
119: srs9jps
120: StuNick
121: LLCOOLSTEVE
========================
2013 Order of Merit Winner: Louis

Jan - May 2013 Champions League Winner: Gooders
Jan - May 2013 UEFA Cup winner: Scoopster
Aug - Dec 2013 Champions League Winner: Little Fozzie
Aug - Dec 2013 UEFA Cup Winner: Stigma
========================
122: No1Fan
123: PoolKing
124: LLCOOLSTEVE
125: 3 Beers at HT
126: Louis
127: Finbar
128: LLCOOLSTEVE
129: 3 Beers at HT
130: Finbar
131: Funk Butter
132: Stig
133: Louis

2014 Order of Merit winner: Finbar
Jan - May 2014 Champions League Winner: Stigma
Jan - May 2014 UEFA Cup winner: Bellyman
Aug - Dec 2014 Champions League Winner: Ardeo
Aug - Dec 2014 UEFA Cup Winner: PoolKing
Winter Olympics 2014 Winner: srs9jps

134: Gooders
135: Finbar
136: 3 Beers at HT
137: Funk Butter
138: €pfc
139: Gooders
140: Funk Butter
141: Louis
142: evvo111
143: pauldrulez
144: Louis
145: evvo111

2015 Order of Merit winner: Finbar
Jan - May 2015 Champions League Winner: Funk Butter
Jan - May 2015 UEFA Cup winner: Flat Noodle
Aug - Dec 2015 Champions League Winner: PoolKing
Aug - Dec 2015 UEFA Cup Winner: Little Fozzie
===============================
146: Louis
147: PoolKing
148: Louis
149: evvo111
150: LLCOOLSTEVE
151: StuNick
152: 3 Beers at HT
153: evvo111
154: Finbar
155: 3 Beers at HT
156: Finbar
157: StuNick
2016 Order of Merit winner: StuNick
Jan - May 2016 Champions League Winner: Finbar
Jan - May 2016 UEFA Cup winner: Little Fozzie
Euros 2016 special winner: 3 Beers at HT
2016 Olympics Winner: Funk Butter
Aug - Dec 2016 Champions League Winner: gjohnk
Aug - Dec 2016 UEFA Cup Winner: €pfc

158: 3 Beers at HT
159: Stigma
160: Finbar
161: 3 Beers at HT
162: StuNick
163: Louis
164: Louis
165: PoolKing
166: Louis
167: Finbar
168: Kayjay
169: StuNick
2017 Order of Merit winner: StuNick
Jan - May 2017 Champions League Winner: gjohnk
Jan - May 2017 UEFA Cup winner: Funk Butter
Aug - Dec 2017 Champions League Winner: StuNick
Aug - Dec 2017 UEFA Cup Winner: Louis

170: Louis
171: Finbar

Rules are as follows

1 Every player has 200 points to bet with in the first round.

2 Each separate bet made is 10 points meaning players have 20 bets during the first 20 days. Maximum bet on a single market is 10 points, same rule applies for identical multis (basically no duplicate bets though you can do a team A, team B double on one bet and then add team C for a treble in another bet)

3 In the second round the 4* finalists all start by carrying forward 25% of their score from the first round added to the 150 points that can bet used in the second round. The person who qualifies for the final with the most points also gets an additional 10pt bet. (*if the number of participants gets to 16 or more, then a 5th finalist place will be added and then one more for every 5 players on top of that).

4 Betting Masters, first group stages runs from 0000 on the first of the month (standard UK time) to 2359hrs on the 20th of the month. Then the top four* posters come together in a mini league from there on until the end of the month.
Final bet settlement must occur before 2359 on the last day of the month.

5 Naturally the winner is the person with the highest score at the end of the last day of the month.

6 Scoring consists of total winnings and is inclusive of 10 point stake i.e. someone bets on a 6/4 horse and it wins their score becomes 25 (15 points profits plus the 10 pt stake) There is no score for any bets not used. Losing bets are scored as zero, not -10.
Any bet from an exchange bookie will have a 4% commission (on the winnings), if nothing else is explicitly stated in the post.

7 Players must quote where they're getting their prices.

8 Singles and upwards accepted.

9 For boxed multis and bets such as Yankees, each separate bet within the bet counts as separate and will cost 10pts per bet. e.g. ten trebles from five selections will use up 100 points.

10. E/W bets are counted as two bets in the masters, which means 10 points x 2

11. For tracking purposes, players are requested to put the outcome of their bets on the post for all events other than European soccer/tennis.

12. Where possible players are requested to put down a running total of their bets in their posts, although I'll also try and produce rolling league tables where possible.

13. After a bet has been posted up, one is not allowed to edit it..

14. The bets must be possible to do in real life, meaning for example that if you got a multi, all the odds have to come from 1 bookmaker. You can’t shop around for the highest odds and put them together. "Special promotion" type bets are not allowed though BOG (Best Odds Guaranteed) are.

15. Bets must be placed at odds of 1/10 (or 1.1 in decimal) or higher

16. Any Draw No Bet bets where the result is a push will always have the bet settled as void, never 10pts. Any asian handicap bet where the result is a push (in full) will have the bet settled as void. Any asian handicap where half of the stake is returned will be marked down as 5pts with the remainder of the Asian handicap settled as a win or a loss (this is applicable for asian handicaps such as 2.25 or -2, -2.5 etc)

17. In the event that a player is not sure if their bet will finish in time, before midnight on the 20th or midnight for qualifying midnight on the final day of the month for the final, they can make a provisional bet or bets which then become actual bets only if their original selection(s) finishes at 12.01am or after

Peaceful prisoners burnt alive

Fatalities and injuries as Veneuzuelans are burnt alive by prison guards whilst on peaceful protest in Venezuela.

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Hope our Leader of the Oppositon condemns this.

Season ticket found

Hiya,
Not sure if this is the right place but found a season ticket
on the road away from the ground after the game belonging to
a Patrick O'neill, lower holmesdale....
If anyone knows of, happy to pop in the post.....
Cheers

How many points have we dropped on the last ten minutes of games this season?

Our in game management at closing out games, is inept. How many points have we thrown away ?

Match updates 31st March

West Ham One up after 13 mins against the Saints, tidy finish from Joao Mario

Neil Swarbrick - Today’s Refereee

Is this actually true or has someone been playing around on Wiki!?

Neil Swarbrick (born 20 December 1965) is an English professional football referee who officiates primarily in the Premier League having been promoted to the Select Group of Referees in 2011. Swarbrick revealed in a 2011 interview that he is a massive Liverpool FC fan.

Attached Images

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Player Ratings And Reviews: Liverpool (home)

Poll to follow

Live Com and Updates: Crystal Palace v Liverpool KO 12:30 Sky Sports PL/ME

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Peaceful protesters shot in cold blood.

Fatalities and injuries as Palestinians are shot at by snipers whilst on peaceful protest in Gaza.

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Hope our prime minister condemns this.

Ray Wilkins fighting for his life

Ray Wilkins fighting for his life

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Hope he pulls through

Derby having their Sunderland moment

Just like us on that extroadinary day Derby have shipped 4 and had their woodwork rattled twice at home to this bizarre club. They will be rubbing their eyes and wondeing what strange place they just entered. The sadist in me is quite enjoying it

Auctions

Has anyone been to an auction? Not Sothebys or Christies level, but the ones you might see on Bargain Hunt. Is there an auction house near to Croydon?

So you are in Brighton on Bank Holiday Friday with kids and it's raining...

Suggestions on what to do pls? Including parking and eating. Thanks...

Bill Maynard

Brown bread at 89

Loved Selwyn Frogget

Old Programmes (free to a good home)

If anyone collects old programmes i've got an odd bunch of 20 or so from the 90s and early 00s. A few of them are signed (in most cases I have no idea by who - though one is definitely David Tuttle).

Free to a good home, otherwise they're going in the recycling. Let me know if you're interested.

Happy Easter

Hope people are having a nice bank holiday.

I’m with family and children opening Easter eggs is almost as good as Xmas. It shows how lovely humanity has the potential to be :)

Whats your Home page ?

So as the title says what is ya home page ?

CPFC Accounts 2016-17

Deadline day is tomorrow so must be imminent, it's hard to control the excitement.

Maybe we should do a sweep on what our losses will be? Or what our wage bill is. I'm going for £10m loss and wage bill of £95m.

Irish rugby players trial

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Interested to know what the people who had total faith in the juries verdict and initial outcome of the Ched Evans trial make of this?

Looks to me a case of the accused being very fortunate indeed. Seems like there is even clearer evidence of guilt than there was for Evans, yet they got off. Further underlining my concerns about putting complete faith in the process when forming personal judgement.

Hidden guest cameos

For some reason I’ve always found it fascinating hearing someone make an uncredited guest appearance on someone else’s song.

Here are some I know of:

We Love You - Rolling Stones: Lennon and McCartney backing vocals

Fade in-out - Oasis: Johnny Depp slide guitar

Young Americans - David Bowie: Luther Vandros backing vocals

Somebody’s watching me - Rockwell: Michael Jackson backing vocals

Beat it - Michael Jackson: Eddie Van Halen guitar solo

Guitar gently weeps - The Beatles: Eric Clapton on lead guitar

You’re so vain - Carly Simon: Mick Jagger backing vocals

There must be an angel - Eurythmics: Stevie Wonder harmonica

Vegetables - Beach Boys: McCartney chomping on vegetables



Any others?

Happy Birthday

Congratulations to these two guys:

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Same old refs

So tomorrow we have Neil Swabrick for the 4th time this season. On a thread about Marriner notching up his 4th game a while back i showed how many times we have been given each referee this season. There are 18 referees on the PL Elite list.

Law of averages (and fairness) would suggest you should get 1 home game and 1 away game with any referee plus 2 other games. (This might change slightly depending on referees stated allegiances although i don't think that is an issue in our case, most refs are northern)

Here is how we fare:

Refereed us 4 times
Kevin Friend
Andre Marriner
Michael Oliver
Neil Swarbrick*

Refereed us 3 times
Mike Dean
Jonathan Moss

Refereed us 2 times
Stuart Attwell
Robert Madley
Anthony Taylor

Refereed us 1 time
Martin Atkinson
Chris Kavanagh
Lee Mason
Craig Pawson

Not refereed us this season
Roger East
Mike Jones
Lee Probert
Graham Scott
Paul Tierney

*Swarbrick includes this weekend.

Whether they are any good or not is an ongoing question however surely it is not right that we constantly get the same ones over and over again.

70% of out games have been officiated by just 33% of the referees available.

Discussion: Omar Yabroudi

Very interesting piece in the National about this guy
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He's Dougies top player spotter, the man responsible for bolasie and just recently jach and vincente guaita
Apologies that I can't give a better link but worth looking up

Want to get married in Vegas?

Here's an odd offer...

A friend of mine at a US TV company is seeking a couple from the UK who...

"...is interested in traveling to Vegas for a 2-3 day shoot that includes wedding dress shopping, maybe a visit to a Vegas tourist attraction/hot spot and culminating in a Las Vegas wedding".

I mean, that's a sweet offer for the right couple :love::love:

It's a serious offer though, if you, or a couple you know are interested email Jeff at...

JFultonRevolution@gmail.com

Press Conference Live: Hodgson Pre Liverpool Press Conference

The Palace website suggests that Roy held his press conference today!

I cannot find it on either the Website and/or Mobile App.

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The Where are they now file.

Whatever happened to Robert Kilroy Silk?

Generation Identity

Anyone come across this lot?

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Apparently they have been dropping banners in central London and fights have kicked off in bars.

Jews and Arabs living side by side

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Anyone know anything about this small community? I've never heard of it.

The history of the middle east is tragic in this regard. Not just the ethnic cleansing of Arabs from Israel, but also Jewish people from middle eastern countries. There used to be vibrant Jewish communities across Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria etc etc now there are virtually none. I think there is one Jewish people living in Afghanistan now :(

Crystal Ball Liverpool home

score, scorers and attendance predictions please

Lewis Grabban's brother-in-law

(was going to put this in football talk, but seeing as SJ is still in Palace Talk, here goes

Lewis Grabban is doing well for himself. Pity his brother-in-law is a ****

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"A footballer's brother-in-law has admitted crashing the player's brand new £250,000 car moments after it was delivered.

Aston Villa player Lewis Grabban had arranged for Michael O'Donnell to receive the grey Ferrari at his home.

But O'Donnell decided to take the supercar for a spin, crashing into a tree and causing £93,000 of damage.

He admitted aggravated vehicle taking and was given a 12-month driving ban and a community order.

St Albans Crown Court heard the striker, who played for Championship side Reading at the time, had left O'Donnell to "take receipt" of the Ferrari 488 GTB last April.

When it arrived, he and his friend Gokan Kiziloz, who admitted the same charges, posed for photos with it and started the engine before deciding to take it out on the road.

Kiziloz drove the car along Vineyards Road in Potters Bar before they headed back towards Mr Grabban's home.

Prosecutor Peter Shaw said he "put his foot down slightly and lost control" before coming off the road and hitting a tree." (BBC 27-3-2018)

Atos/dwp

I’ve had 13 strokes and 4 heart attacks so am signed off sick. Now after waiting for months for a second class letter I have to have an assessment with atos to go on full disability. Are these people as bed as their reputation? Am kind of nervous about this...

Live Com and Updates: U23 Vs Charlton

U23 game against Charlton this afternoon. Wickham starts, no Jach or Rakip

Fired Vancouver waiter: I'm not rude, just French (a thread for Les)

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Quote:

A waiter in Canada fired for "aggressive" and "rude" behaviour towards other staff says he has an excuse: he's French.

Far Cry 5

Out today, picked up a copy this morning.

Looking forward to giving this a spin in the next few days, certainly over Easter.

100 quid taken from my account by Itunes.

My daughter was using a Piano learning app. After a while it asked if i wanted a trial period ( which i clicked yes on ) i thought a bit odd as we had already used it for about a week. When i was abroad working 100 quid was suddenly taken from the account. WTF.

Any app i have used before required me to actively agree to start paying after a trial period. Is this normal practice to have to actively cancel trial periods otherwise they take a yearly subscription?

Apologise to the person whose profile you accidentally clicked on today

As I've said before on here, I've never clicked on anyone's profile deliberately, like some crazed stalker. It's just the failing of my shitty, old phone, that also unsubscribes me from dozens of threads, rather than taking me to the 'last page'.

The tragedy is, I don't even have 'sausage fingers'. If anything, they are delightfully slender piano player's hands.

Today's apology goes to - Golf Boy. Sorry, Golf Boy.

JACK LLOYD - Mascot V Liverpool on Saturday

Please would you be kind enough to provide a proper Palace welcome to Jack on Saturday. Jack is the 10 year old son of one of my friends and I outline his story below. One thing I must say is CPFC have been absolutely brilliant in organising his day.

Jack was born with autism and Type 1 diabetes and is self taught by his Mum at home.

In September 2016 Jack was diagnosed with a rare pineal tumour in his brain and underwent major surgery the following day. He underwent further surgery in October 2016 to debulk the tumour. Unfortunately Jack had a bleed on his brain during surgery and then spent a further 10 days in intensive care and the high dependency unit at Kings College Hospital. Once Jack settled down after six and a half weeks he was then transferred to The Royal Marsden Hospital for chemotherapy and radiotherapy treatment.

By the time he was referred to The Marsden he had developed posterior fossa syndrome which meant he would have to relearn to do everything from holding his head up, sitting, standing and finally walking and is unable to speak. As Jack couldn’t open his mouth he had more surgery to fit a PEG (which is a feeding tube through his stomach wall) and a potacath.

Jack was an inpatient at The Marsden for 3 weeks undergoing chemotherapy and radiotherapy.His lack of communication skills were extremely frustrating for him and every medical procedure was difficult and a stressful time for the whole family.

Whilst Jack still cannot talk or eat and is PEG fed he is improving slowly every day. He is walking short distances inside at home and is regaining his fine motor skills.

At the beginning of this month Jack went back to The Marsden for a check up and it is with a heavy heart we are sharing this news Jack has another brain tumour in a different part of his brain.

Surgery is not an option, so we have been told that they can manage his symptoms but they are advising us to think about his quality of life over quantity of time.

We are just beyond devastated & feeling completely helpless we’ve been told Jack has months but could have as much as a year. The family are set to make lots more memories with Jack.

Thank you all for taking the time to read...........

M-Pesa - african money system

I'm planning a safari holiday. Probably Kenya.

It seems over there the most used payment system is a form of mobile banking called To view the link you have to Register or Login.

I'm wondering if anyone has any experience of it, and ideally knows how I can sign up and start using it from the UK? It would help a lot with booking trains and safaris.

5 easy steps to check what Data Facebook hold on you

Five simple steps to check what data facebook holds on you . Takes a
few minutes to do .

There are five simple steps to getting the information:

#AD
Log on to Facebook
Go to Settings
Scroll to the bottom of General Account Settings, and click on ‘Download a copy of your Facebook data’
Put your personal e-mail address when prompted
Once the data has been collected, you'll be asked to put in your password
And from there, it is all there for you to read.

Just a small sample of available items to wade through include all of your private messages, all blocked/removed/deleted friends, all political and/or religious views, full information on all of your active sessions (where, when, and on what device), credit card details (if you have purchased anything via Facebook), phone numbers, Facial Recognition Data and IP address information.

The full list of downloadable information is actually quite staggering, especially if you have been a member of Facebook for a number of years.


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No more family at the Whitehorse Lane end!!

As part of the proposed development, by lengthening the pitch from 101m to 105m to accommodate “international” matches .. ALL 690 family seats will be lost !!!! Leaving home support vacuum at one end of Selhurst .. with the concentration of vociferous away fans in the corner , with the stroke of an architect’s pencil you’re going to destroy the home support and famous atmosphere that prevails at Palace. It’s commendable that the space will accommodate 48 fans restricted to wheelchair access and their companions - but the real answer comes in moving the Sainsbury’s and sorting a proper stand or giving up this pretence that international teams will be queuing up to brave the south east London traffic. In the interim the corporate boxes will not help our keeper or cagoule the opposition - they will soon come to realise that if they keep the ball in that quarter of the pitch, it’ll be like playing a good portion of the match with “Home” support. Wake up to this lunacy while there is still time to rectify it !!

Rasing Funds for Children with Cancer UK

Hi guys, it's rare that I post on the BBS, but 4 weeks ago something happened that rocked my families world. We found a lump on my 10 year ild son's back. We thought it was possibly a cyst, so took him to the doctors. After numerous tests and scans it was found that my son Charlie was diagnosed as having a cancerous tumor, a sarcoma. A very rare form of cancer in children, so rare that the doctor said that she hadn't seen a child with his specific sarcoma for several years. It's a form of cancer that forms in the bones or soft tissue, in this case the muscles in his back.

Since then things have moved quick and my son was rushed in to The Royal Orthopedic Hospital in Stanmore, after the tumor was pressing on his spinal cord and his legs had gone numb and very cold. He had an emergency operation on Friday night, and is currently in hospital. He also had another operation today, as he developed a Pneumothorax, which meant he required a chest drain. As you can imagine, the last four weeks have been very difficult, seeing Charlie in so much pain, and even more so now seeing him in hospital going through this at such a young age.

The reason why I am posting this is because I was wondering if the CPFC family can help me. As soon as my daughter found out her brother has cancer she wanted to do something to help him and other children like him. She wants to raise £2,500 and, if we do, she has offered to shave her head for charity. We chose the charity Children with Cancer UK, which helps fund research in to cancer in Children and finding a cure.

It would be fantastic if we could raise this money to help other children like Charlie. It's hard to know what to write about this, as it's still very fresh and my daughter, Rachael, was determined to help in someway.Below is a link to the Just Giving for my son Charlie, with more details etc. Plus I have put a link to the charity itself.

Thank you for reading

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Suggestion: Jamal Lowe - Portsmouth

Looks a bit tasty. Fast, good control scores and makes goals.

Only 23. I would take a chance on him

Summer songs.

As we've entered BST, what better excuse to tell us your favourite songs with Summer in the title.


I'll start with...

Here Comes the Summer by the Undertones

Are the Tories turning to Blairism?

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What with the NHS pay rises and the above announcement on boosting Midwife numbers etc it's seems to me the Tories are slowing softening their limited Government and pro business stance to Blairism in response to Corbyn's last election manifesto and to counter growing left-wing populism among the British electorate .

Palace/Leicester yesterdays Ding Dong

Thought that might attract your attention....good to meet football fans,that have a clue whats what for a change,ended up in a swanky coc.ktail bar but thank goodness it was Palace.........see you lads in a few weeks for a few beers .......:D

Gervais returns to stand up with unoriginal material that some call transphobic

Quote:

So Ricky Gervais, best known to the modern media consumer as a the millionaire Golden Globes host who spends his free time being a dick to randos on Twitter, put out his first stand-up special in seven years, titled Humanity. While the show has a marketing campaign designed to make it appear to be the comedic version of 300 with none of the homoeroticism and washboard abs — but all the toxic masculinity — he spends it complaining about people being shitty to him on Twitter and mocking transgender people. Of course there's already been a whole J-school class assignment's worth of hot takes on how offensive the material is to trans people, but for me there's a whole different aspect of not only Ricky's material but that of every comedian doing specials on Netflix, HBO, or wherever that offends me. You see, I'm a transgender stand-up comic, and not one of these jokes is funny. Oh, not because they're offensive to my delicate she-male sensibilities, but because they're hack garbage.

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Forest Owner to do Time .... ?

.... for drug trafficking in Greece ?
'Fit and Proper Person' test strikes again ?

Stuart Jump

On the eagles.cpfc website there is an article naming the 19 Palace players that have played against England. Stuart Jump is not mentioned but, if my memory serves me right, Jump guested for the USA against England, am I right?

We are going to win world cup

Beating Dutch in their own patch.

Defenders passing and running with the ball

World class striker in Kane

And I feel it is written Southgate is our manager after the heartache of 96

Footballs coming home !

Match Updates: International Friendlies: 23rd - 27th March

Latest: Turkey 1 Eire 0

Terrrorist shot dead in France

Terrorist shot dead in France after killing three people. Thought they had been quite for a while.

Most annoying YouTube channel you hate to admit you Love?

Archie luxury ... ****ers!

Live Com and Updates: Palace U23s vs Barnsley U23s

Pubs for: Bournemouth

where do people usually drink down in Bournemouth before the game?

Discussion: If We Stay Up

if we stay up this squad needs serious investment.

KEEP WILF!!!!!!

Resign:
Ward, Sako, Mccarthur, Kelly and Cabaye.

I would like to see both Loftus Cheek and Fosu mensah as permanent signings

New signings:

Goalkeeper: with Guita coming in on a free we should be covered for first choice but a younger 2nd choice should be considered maybe bring in bialkowski from Ipswich.

Defence: we are covered well at both full back positions but maybe bring in a younger ball playing centre half such as
Moore from reading.

Midfield: I would love us to have a strong CDM with Luke so bring in amedou from Lille or dendecker from anderlecht. a creative attacking midfielder would be vital so how about foriesteri from Wednesday or maybe even Gabbiadini if the saints drop Tadic would also be worth an enquiry.

Wingers: Someone to improve on and push Townsend and relieve pressure on Wild would be great Quincy Promes would be a diamond player to nab with a great eye for goal.

Striker: Tough one but need someone with more mobility who can also score goals an impressive buy would be soares from lot to. very mobile and pacy.

1895 Crystal Palace FC v Aston Villa programme sold at auction

A surviving programme for Crystal Palace v Aston Villa, played on 30 November 1895 in Crystal Palace stadium, was sold for £1000 at auction yesterday:

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The deployment of this amateur team, coached by the manager of the Corinthians, Nicholas Lane Jackson, was the first action in the Crystal Palace Company's ten-year battle with the FA to allow a resident professional Crystal Palace FC to play in the Crystal Palace stadium. The FA finally relented in 1905.

The full story of the Crystal Palace Company's decade-long struggle to persuade the Football Association to allow Palace to be formed can be found in Volume 2 of the Origin of Crystal Palace FC which can be found here:

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Uk bank account.

Can you open a UK bank account if you don't live in the UK?

Damien Delaney

Dont know what the club have planned at seasons end as we all know his legs have gone,but would love to see Damien get some sort of coaching role with us when he retires as i would love to see he work ethic passed on to the youngsters.
I dont think Damien ever gave less than a 100% for the club and the fans and his and Jedinaks attitude are in my eyes one of the main reasons we are in the premier league now:p

Have we ever relied on one player more than we do Wilf right now?

OK, through stats about not winning games when Wilf doesn't play or just seeing with your own eyes, we rely on Wilf this season to a massive extent, that is obvious.

Question : has there ever been a time when we were as reliant on one player not being injured or always playing well? Peter Taylor must be close (which is why Southampton set out to crock him in the 76 semi final).

Any others come to mind?

China Cup

So Wales played China and won 6-0. Just how bad are they? Proves just how poor that league is and how blatant it is that going there is purely a money grab.

Chinese fans cheered Bale wildly so his hat trick made everyone happy. Now Wales’ all time leading goal scorer.

Giggs’ first game as manager. Not sure I saw him stand up.

Clean sheet for Wayne.

Likely to play Uruguay in the final which will be a whole lot harder.

Following palace in poor weather

On the back of travelling up to Huddersfield at the weekend and crawling home in blizzards, I was wondering if anyone else had memories of similar experiences, be it at the ground or to/from.

I also had the misfortune of travelling to Everton a few years back with the high wind postponement (which I didn't think was too bad) and the Liverpool home "flashflood" postponement.

Mrs Biggus musical beer mats

Mrs Biggus makes these beers mats out of tiles, she paints and fires them herself....we think they're rather good.

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Stoke (a) Saturday 5th May

Stoke tickets on sale on Tuesday 27th March, for home ST holders:-

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Tickets will be priced at:
Adults: £30
Over 65s: £21
Under-17s: £17
Under-11s: £14

Tickets will be on sale in the following order:

Phase 1
Friday 23rd March from 10am
Away season ticket holders
One ticket per client reference

Phase 2
Tuesday 27th March from 10am
Season ticket holders and paid members with 4000+ loyalty points
One ticket per client reference

Phase 3
Wednesday 28th March from 10am
Season ticket holders and paid members with 3000+ loyalty points
One ticket per client reference

Phase 4
Thursday 29th March from 10am
Season ticket holders and paid members with 2000+ loyalty points
One ticket per client reference

Phase 5
Friday 30th March from 10am
Season ticket holders and paid members with 1000+ loyalty points
One ticket per client reference

Phase 6
Monday 2nd April from 10am
Season ticket holders – no loyalty points requirement
One ticket per client reference

Phase 7
Tuesday 3rd April from 10am
Paid members – no loyalty points requirement
One ticket per client reference

Phase 8
Wednesday 4th April from 10am
Season ticket holders and paid members can book one additional ticket (maximum of two tickets per client reference) – no loyalty points requirement

All sales phases are subject to availability

Coaches will depart Selhurst Park at 9.30am and are free of charge for season ticket holders and paid members with a match ticket. Guest tickets are priced at £24 per seat.

Vince hilaire autobiography

Out this Thursday

World Cup 2018 Sticker Collection

Anyone getting on this?

The internet.

Has the internet and smartphone technology improved society or made it worse?

Discuss.

Penalty or not?

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It's an hilarious dive, and no doubt most are shocked to see the ref award the penno......

Scammed by Beckenham Tradesman? You Decide.

Hi all, I have an issue a bit similar to that experienced on the scammed online thread, but mine is a bit different so I thought I would start a thread of my own.

In late January I decided that I needed six internal doors replaced. In order to find a good local carpenter I asked a the "Beckenham Appreciation Group", on Facebook to recommend one to me. Several members recommended a local bloke going under the Facebook name of "Marmyte Keith". This the name of his business.

I contracted this bloke and he initially arranged a day to come round and provide me a quote. On the day he was due to come round, I worked from home but he didn't turn up. About three hours after, he contacted me and was very apologetic, saying his wife was ill.

He did turn up the following Sunday and quoted me a price of £30 a door including all trimming and installation of ironmongery. The cost of the doors and ironmongery would come to £250. He wanted this paid up front for the materials via bank transfer. He provided me with a formal invoice for the materials. During the visit he bought his young daughter and did mention his
wife was disabled.

Now, I did hesitate before I paid for this but again reviewed the multiple positive reviews on Facebook and thought that a local tradesmen wouldn't put his reputation at risk by nicking the money. He also added me on Facebook under his business name.

So, I transferred the money on the 24th january and we arranged a date for installation. Here is a timeline of cancellations by the guy:

1st feb - cancelled as doors had not arrived in time.

6th Feb- cancelled as wife taken to hospital with mild stroke.

11th feb - texts me staying that he definitely could do 21 - 22 feb as wife still in hospital and has child care needs

18th - texts me and says he can't do 22nd as wife coming out of hospital. Has to do 23rd instead.

22nd - he can't do 23rd as wifes condition not good. Definitely free on the 2nd march.

1st March- can't get to workshop to get doors because of the snow, rearranges for following Wednesday.

7th again cancelled. Rearranged for 9th. Again cancelled.

8th March - I ask for refund. He says he will see what he can do.

Radio silence for a while as I was away for work.

16th -texted me staying he sent me the money via cheque on the 13th March. He didn't tell me as such on the 13th.

20th March (yesterday) - I text him saying that I still haven't received the cheque. I ask him to cancel it and transfer the money via bank transfer. I give him my details.

Today. Still havent received any reply.

So... I turn to the BBS. What would you do? Have I been scammed or is this guy just got really bad luck?

Even if his story is plausible, he has behaved badly in keeping my money for so long and poor communications. I could threaten to go to the police or to drag his name through the mud on facebook but that might destroy any remaining goodwill between us.

My thoughts on the matter are that he is using me as a credit facility rather than him being a balls out fraudster. I am not sure a fraudster would have kept lines of communications open so long and been as apologetic as well as added me on facebook?

I am not sure if the bank can do anything? I have a full audit trail and proof he hasn't completed the work.

One further thing, his facebook profile does contain the a road location in Beckenham so it all else fails I could just stake him out armed with a snooker ball in a sock :D

Turntable/Deck advice

Folks, I'm ok with sound kit generally because I'm in a band and own a PA. Anyway, a friend of mine wants to connect a pair of turntables to the amp and PA in order to run his own disco using his vinyl collection (northern soul by all accounts) and so I borrowed them to hook up because I thought it would be fine, but I found some odd things.

They are a pair of Kam DDX750's like these



Problems encountered
1. The phono (red/white) outputs have an earth connector, like this

I have no earth connector on my PA. There is a constant buzz because of this. Any idea what to do?

2. The volume isn't very loud even at full whack on the mixer. My amp is 1200W and the speakers are Peavey 250W (RMS) bastards for a rock band. Is the signal that puny?

3. The speed of the record seems weird. When I have a record player it would play the right speed throughout the album. This seems slow at the outside (beginning) and faster at the inside (end). There is a slider for speed +/-10% direct drive but I can't believe you'd need to slide this about constantly? Is it that these are Drum and Bass MC kit and I'm using them for 1970's soul music?

I think one thing missing is this device in the middle which seems to appear on a lot of the images, that might solve these problems.



Seems it's a "Kam KCM450 MKII Mixer". I imagine it's a way of managing the discs and blending the two tables seamlessly for the drugged-up wankers at the party. Does this resolve buzz and boost output?

Thanks for advice :p

Last 2 home sold out

Last 2 home games showing sold out to palace fans.

Simon Jordan mugged

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Simon Jordan Robbed at Gunpoint

According to his twitter he was robbed at gunpoint today in Croydon whilst he had his Dad in the car.

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Mods: Please move if this isn't the correct forum.

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NHS Pay Deal

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An excellent deal for all concerned.

Visitor Messages

I stumbled across Biggin's visitor messages earlier and it is a veritable smorgasbord of opinions, abuse & encouragement - 32 of them in total.

Due to some trickery with a poster who I can't recall, I had to remove the option of receiving visitor messages so I can't play.

But what I am after are other suggestions as to who might have amusing messages/abuse left from various posters on this platform. It feels like I've got a glass to the wall of my neighbour's house.

I assumed Salad_Burnet's would be a good read, but I was left a little disappointed if I'm honest.

Cheers.

OTD in 1918 Operation Micheal /Kaiserschlacht commenced

On this day in 1918, the great German spring offensive commenced.

The biggest day of fighting seen on the Western Front in numbers involved and casualties.

German c.40k with c.11k killed.

British c.38k with c.8k killed, c.21k POWs.

This was when WW1 was almost lost, and then won.

Happy Birthday Mr Positive

HB to our beloved rambo1

Enjoy !

:p

Dog shit

Is there anything I can put down to deter dogs from shitting? Basically, pretty much every day, a dog shits outside my garden path, not the dogs fault, and as I live on a main road, I can't believe the owner is brazen enough not to pick it up. I am pretty sure its the same dog, as the shit looks the same size and shape every day.

If I catch the bastard they will know about it.

But, is there a solution?

Car insurance advice required

We have an issue with our daughters car insurance. These are the main points ( as i see them,
1) We took the insurance (Tesco) out in July
2) My daughter filled in her details online
3) I phoned up and paid the years premium in full
4) My daughter didn't check her details when she received the email with her policy - I accept this was a big mistake!!
5) She recently looked at the policy and discovered various errors where they had mixed up both mine and my daughters names and details
6) We are NOT trying to make a claim
7) They won't transfer the policy in to her name
8) They won't give a full refund and are claiming they would have covered her in the event of an accident as they listened to a recording of my call to them and realise they have made a mistake
9) They are offering approx 1/2 the money back as a refund

So with all that in mind are we justified in asking for a full refund (as i don't believe they would have covered her in the event of an accident ) or would she have received cover if required, in which case we should accept the refund that has been offered?
Also would it be worth contacting the insurance ombudsman?
TIA

Is Plumstead shit?

Currently looking to buy, and Plumstead keeps popping up in my budget.

I don't know anything about the place, apart from britpop one hit wonders Shampoo being from there.

Anyone know what it's like?

Rumour: Tottenham to Low Ball Us Again For Wilf

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Tottenham are set to go back to Crystal Palace with a £40million bid for Wilfried Zaha in the summer.

Roy Hodgson’s Palace will argue their 25-year-old winger is worth significantly more, particularly given the role he has played in their fight for survival.

Palace have lost every league game they have played without Zaha this season — nine in total. But they moved out of the relegation zone when he returned from a knee injury in Saturday’s 2-0 win at Huddersfield, his first start since February 4.

Chelsea have also looked at the Ivory Coast international, who is likely to leave even if Palace avoid the drop.

Tottenham have chased Zaha for some time. They bid £12m in the summer of 2016, an offer Palace chairman Steve Parish blasted as ‘ridiculous’.

Spurs went back with another offer of £21m but that was also rejected.

Zaha’s contract lasts until 2022 and is worth around £100,000 a week.

Sharp Practice

I just phoned up to renew mine and my sons season tickets, and enquired about paying monthly.

I was told that If I look to pay monthly, then I can renew after the 25th March.

The early Bird offer runs until....you guessed, the 25th March.

I can pay monthly from the 26th March, which means I do not benefit from the early bird offer.

I am not the only one who has questioned this with the box office. to me it's sharp practice. Why not offer the early bird to those that might want to spread the cost over 10 months. Money is money at the end of the day.

It's things like this that really P me off, and also let Palace down.

Palace should treat everyone fairly, and in this case they are not.

Bang Out of order

:mad:

Watch your suspensions fellow BBSers

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London and the southeast the worst.

Opportunity to get into the video games industry

I'm posting this as an individual and in no way is this an official announcement of the BBS.


A good friend of mine and Palace fan is chair of the charity, GamesAid.

GamesAid host video game industry comedy events to raise money for various children's charities.

They are also structured to help young people break into the industry and are currently looking for a full time employee on a six month contract.

The last four people who have had this job have been exposed to many of the countries games studios and have all gone onto work within the industry.

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__________________

In the TaBloyeoids.

So with time to fill until the Liverpool match I thought I'd do a little 70's quiz to help pass the time based on newspapers headlines from the era (shown below questions).

You have until a) Someone gets them all or b) Some time this Sunday after Noon.

Enjoy and post any memories jogged by the affore mentioned headlines.


1. Who were the double signings ?

2. Fill in the 6 blanks ( 2 sold,1 pending and 3 brought)

3. Who was 'Mac' that we were being linked with at the time ?

4. John who and the name of the non-English team he got his hat-trick against ?

5. 1974 and TV arrives at Selhurst but where from,who with and who went in the opposite direction ?

6. Who was the Boss and who did Mal want to sign ?

7. Which Palace player became footballs first sponsored player ?

8. Slightly misleading amount as Andy Gray was fined £75 for the same offence and its tied into the article but who was the other up before the F.A on the same day ?

9. Who were the stars and what had they done ?

10. Who did we beat 7-0,what competition and the aggregate score :)

I've added the months next to the years below which may help and I know i've put two number 2's,typo but too late to change ! :)

Killed by AI...

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'What are you doing Dave?'

Bringing opposition supporters to Palace

I have a good friend of 30 years + who is a great chap but supports Wolves. His local team as a a lad 65 odd years ago. We were talking about our hopes for next season and if the football gods are nice could find ourselves in the same division for the 1st time in ages. In the old days we would find a quiet corner of the Arthur or main stand but wondered what the ettiquite is today. I don't think a 70 year old is going to cause much trouble :D

The rise and(possible) end of Ant Mcpartlin

I know it's innocent until proved guilty but judging by his recent trip to rehab following a messy separation from his wife and now facing a DD charge after colliding with parked vehicles whilst under the influence it now does seem that this media darling may be coming to an end although whether ITV will drop him or not is to be seen.

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Planning For Next Season...

I hate to be that person starting a thread about staying up after one good result, but I'm filled with this strange feeling of positivity after Saturday.

Re-watching the highlights, it strikes me what a good nucleus we have when everyone is fit. So IF we do stay up, & IF we do keep hold of Wilf & IF we manage to keep hold of a few out of contract players, we should be left with the following:

(Those in bold out of contract)

Goalkeepers
Guaita
Hennessey
Speroni

Defenders
Ward
Wan-Bissaka
Tomkins
Sakho
Dann
Kelly
PvA
Schlupp

Midfielders
Luka
McArthur
Cabaye
Riedewald
Townsend
Zaha
Sako

Strikers
Benteke
Sorloth
Wickham

Obviously, there's a bit of worry over centre mid should Jimmy & Yohan leave. We also need another striker at least - Benteke could be on the move in the summer anyway as he doesn't really strike me as a Roy player.

Our problem over the past few seasons hasn't been the quality of the starting XI, it's been the lack of depth when we do get a couple of injuries. Should the board finally address this & back the manager sufficiently to give him suitable cover in every position then we really would be on for a top 10 finish under Roy.

I'm expecting to get shot down in flames here as there's still a high likelihood we can go down & I'd look a real prat after posting this. But after weeks of negativity, Saturday does seem to have given some hope & it does seem like it's not necessarily doom & gloom going forward.

Matbha

Happy birthday fella.:p






































:jerkit::angel::love:

Most Hated 11

I have a sincere hatred of many players in the Premier League so I decided to put my team of 11 together. Who would be your team of current Premier League teams that you hate the most


GK Kasper Schmeichel - Purely from the fact that his dad was an arse
RB Craig Dawson - For his elbow on Jules
CB Lewis Dunk - Although he does have some comedic benefits
CB Gary Cahill - John Terry isn't in the Prem, so it has to be this clown
LB Ashley Young - No explanation necessary
LM James Mclean - Dickhead
CM Wayne Rooney - Ex Manc, still wank
CM Ross Barkley - Dickhead
RM Jesse Lingard - Wanker who hashtags his own nickname #jlingz
CAM Delle Ali - Cheating diving tosser
ST Andy Carroll - Pony tailed wanker who always seems to score against us

Subs:

Xherdan Shaqiri - Ewok
Mateo Darmian - Shave that beard off you tosser
Marouane Felliani - Tall, ugly and a douche
Jonjo Shelvey - After mocking Cabaye while he lay on the ground injured
Anthony Knockeart - Cheating little Brighton tosser
Jamie Vardy - Weasle faced arse
Granit Xhaka - Overrated dirty bastard

Manager:

Alan Pardew

Rosacea

Probably something for the older (hopefully) BBS members.

I personally suffer pretty bad with Rosacea, and have done since my early to mid 40's (now 62). I've probably seen 10 dermatologist in that time, and none have done much other than band aid the problem.

It seems drugs work for a while, and then I become immune to them. Tried a lot of soaps and over the counter creams and solutions, but none are particularly helpful.

Been doing a lot of research over the last few days, and it is apparently a mainly female problem, and men are relegated to the fine print of any articles on the subject. The obvious difference being if men want to shave, Rosacea can be a big problem, especially if it comes with pimples as mine does.

Basically asking if there are any fellow sufferers on the BBS, and if so do they have any magic want that helps them?

Would love to hear of any crackpot home remedies or potions people could recommend.

Regards.

Crystal Ball Last Six Kiwicumulator

Here's our run-in and it could be worse.

AFC Bournemouth away
Brighton & Hove Albion home
Watford away
Leicester City home
Stoke City away
West Bromwich Albion home

What that means for our predictive powers is another story... Rub your balls by 2.59pm on the 7th of April for a chance to win:
0 correct - bonus point
3 correct - 1 point
4 correct - 3 points
5 correct - 5 points
6 correct - 7 points.

For fun, I've added a poll - it is worth nothing!!!

First names on back of Shirts

I find it irritating certain players are allowed to have their first names on the back of shirts. I noticed Van Djik yesterday had Virgil, Soares has Cedric, Alli has Dele. Im sure Ward wouldnt be allowed to have Joel on the back if he wanted. Neil Ruddock wasnt allowed to have Razor on the back of his shirt when he played for us so why is Hernandez allowed to have Chimichanga or whatever bollox he has.

Hacks (you-tube)

I have an LG washing machine and it just stopped working, only solution was to call a service bloke but checked on Youtube first.....The lady in the Youtube video paid for the service guy got told she needed a new circuit board $400.00 but then got a tip on the net...Unplug the washing machine hold down the power button for 5 seconds then the start for 5 seconds, plug it back in and try.

Basically resetting the computer

It worked for her and me saving a call out...Put in a new pump in my LG dishwasher as well by looking at a vid on youtube plus a heating fan in my truck.....

Anyone else saved a bundle by this wonderful internet thinggee?

The defence

The 4 that played V Huddersfield yesterday would be my first choice for the rest of the season if they stay fit.

AWB has been a revelation. And whatever Roy has said to PVA has him playing at his very best. Thomkins has been superb and Sahko is quality.

With Jimmy mac and Luka in front of them We have a very solid defensive setup..........at last!

They Have Only Done Good Song(As far as I know)

Snow Patrol -Run
Mariah Carey - Emotion
Spice Girls -Who Do You Think You Are
S Club 7 -Don't Stop Movin'

Things That Are Crap

Toby Jugs

"Big Data" web unravelling

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Cambride Analytica, who ran leave and Trump campaigns also have been banned from Facebook for abusing and mining using data for what some have suggested may have been military level psy-ops

Terrible First Names

Thomasina
Henrietta
Nigella
Edna
Mabel
Herbert

Mike Dean

credit where its due, top quality today, allowed the game to flow, had a word when needed, but didnt allow things to get out of hand booking players when deserved.....

Suggested Team and Formation For: Liverpool 31st march

Your starting line up vs Liverpool at home ?

Player Ratings And Reviews: vs huddersfield 17th march

Your player of today's match is ?

wilf ok

Hodgson just said

Staying up

2 and 3 points clear from 2nd 3rd from bottom with a great last 6, and Liverpool a free hit due to this win.

we should not go down from this position and with our top players back

Eagles

Match Updates: 17/18/19 March

Swansea 3-0 down.

Live Com and Updates: Huddersfield Town v Crystal Palace (3:00 PM on a Saturday)

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Places to watch the game tomorrow

OK gonna be up town tomorrow... Is there anywhere in Central London showing the game?

Anyone ideas let me know!

Watching the Huddersfield Game in Barcelona

Afternoon all,

Any suggestions on where to watch the game tomorrow in Barcelona? Here for the weekend and would definitely like to watch it in a bar with a few cervezas.

Cheers

TUI Advert (Surely you would have seen it)

Sorry thought this deserved a thread of it’s own.

I just heard that this campaign may go in until October.

Surely given the tidal wave of mental health issues this should be stopped now.

Ain’t Nobody care?

Holmesdale fanatics display v Brighton

Are the fanatics were due to do a display for the Brighton game? Would be great if we could show them what real support is like.

Topman apologise for 96 shirt

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they released a red shirt with 96 what goes around comes around and karma written on it and Liverpool fans complained and it has been withdrawn

Crystal Ball Huddersfield away

score, scorers and attendance please

Scottish west coast and Isles

:) Off to the west coast of Scotland and Islands. Can any of the well travelled BBS recommend any must see, must go places? Much appreciated.

Press Conference Live: Pre-Huddersfield Thursday 1:30pm

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Jim Bowen.

I liked him. RIP.

Stoke Away August 1970 - what colour kit did we wear?

OK - probably one for Ian King or Tony 1947 or someone else of a certain vintage (is Alan Russell still around).

In August 1970 we played Stoke away in a completely on-off kit. The pics I have seen are only in black and white so it's impossible to tell what colour the kit was.

Does anyone know what colour the kit was - and why the one-off nature of the kit change?

Attached Images

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Name that Ground

Suggestions to Mr Parish re New Ground Name

Tasty Jerk Arena ?

Amy's story

Hope this is ok mods.

My little sis is currently undergoing chemo. She's started a just giving page to raise money.
I'd be well chuffed if people can chip in.

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Many thanks.

concrete chips and soggy semolina

Is it right that children, if they live in Norn Iron, are exempt from the bill passed in parliament today that will mean many many kids will lose out on a free school meal?

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(Note I've done my best to find a neutral report)

Match Updates: Champions League and Europa League 13-15 March

Just a quick shout out to Sevilla before this evenings game at the theatre of wanks - do it for the good of the game my friends, 99 per cent of English football fans are rooting for you.

Reclaimed/restored cast iron fireplaces in London

Does anyone know of anywhere in London that has a good selection of reclaimed/restored cast iron fireplaces?

Cheers

Travel Information Stoke Away - Saturday 5th May Train Tickets

Understand there is a small chance the Stoke game could be moved for TV as the May TV fixtures haven't been announced, but for those that want to take advantage (and the risk), Virgin Trains have their sale launching this Thursday (or today if an O2 Priority customer)

Got a Return from London for £18, with pretty much all fast Virgin trains showing at this price on the day, so worth considering for this crucial end of season clash

College Basketball Bracket competition 2018

If anyone is interested I have set up a CPFC bracket for the upcoming college basketball competition via Yahoo.

Link is

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Password is “I Love Gattis”

Live Com and Updates: Crystal Palace u23 v Cardiff u23. Livestream available on eagles.co.uk

BBS Haiku

Biggin the Coney
Hall Village idiot posts
very stupid things


I really thought that
Maz is a lady because
of that profile pic


Turkish hair transplant
makes elgin eagle look like
Action Man. Really

Shaving clubs

Shaving clubs have you tried them ?

What is your opinion and who does the best blades ?

Cleaning up our act!!

30 games in and no red cards (54 yellows) is an unusual stat for us. Usually someone loses their head or decides they need a holiday. If this carries on until the end of the season, what do we win?

Ken Dodd dead

That's all

How many times has anyone changed their mind on the BBS?

Does it ever happen? Does anyone ever back down and say “yep, I’m talking bollox, you’re right?

Or is it a huge dick waving contest.

The bells are tolling for Commons Speaker John Bercow - Harriet Harman to take over

There were whispers from the moment the bullying and sexual harrassment of women in Westminster began to gain a head of steam that there were some murky goings-on likely to be exposed.

We have seen the somewhat undignified departure from Ministerial office of of senior Tory and close Theresa May friend Damian Green over the laptop porn saga, and two senior Welsh Labour politicians have died suddenly and unexpectedly, one a suicide, over sex allegations.

The rumours were turned up a few notches last week with gathering clouds over the Speaker of the House of Commons, elfin-featured John Bercow, whose tenure of the third highest political office in the land has never been far from controversial.

In a pincer movement seeing some Conservative MPs, many of whom have grown to loathe their nominal colleague, the Right Honourable Member for Buckingham, since his elevation to the Chair, moving in to demand he step aside whilst the House of Commons investigates claims Bercow bullied his female secretary to the point of mental breakdown - and Labour front up the veteran MP Harriet Harman to take over the job, given that it is Labour's 'turn' to have the job.

Ms Harman herself has kept her own counsel but many see her as eminently well-suited to the job and that she is a woman being hugely important symbolically (not that there has not been a woman Speaker before - there has, as well as several Deputy Speakers).

Some might say Bercow has brought this on himself and richly deserves to be packed off into political Siberia, irrespective of the truth of the abuse allegations.

Arise Speaker Harman.

Poland no sunday trading

A Polish law banning almost all trade on Sundays has taken effect, with large supermarkets and most other retailers closed for the first time since liberal shopping laws were introduced in the 1990s after the collapse of communism

Would this be welcomed in the uk ?


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The run in - fixtures and analysis

I did a quick review of the remaining fixtures for each team that is still in danger of the drop - which seems to be 9 teams at the moment - and thought others might find this useful/of interest.

Here's the run in for each team, the current position of each team they're facing, and then a calculation of the average place of team they're facing.







Things to observe:
- Palace have a considerably easier run of games left than everyone else.
- Brighton have by far the hardest, but are currently 7 points clear and could be job done by the time they play us. If not then who knows.
- Stoke, Southampton and West Ham all look precarious.

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My weekly blog

My weekly blog.

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Happy mothers day

Happy mothers day to all the mothers who do such a wonderful job and god bless to all those whose mothers have passed.

Britain's 'worst ever' child grooming scandal exposed: Hundreds of young girls raped,

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Despite similar high-profile cases in Rochdale and Rotherham, authorities in Telford *repeatedly failed to stamp out a network of abusers.



The Mirror’s 18-month investigation reveals abuse on unprecedented levels. We found:

Social workers knew of abuse in the 1990s but police took a decade to launch a probe.
Council staff viewed abused and trafficked children as “prostitutes” instead of victims, according to previously unseen files.
Authorities failed to keep details of abusers from Asian communities for fear of “racism”.
Police failed to investigate one recent case five times until an MP intervened.
One victim said cops tried to stop her finding out why her abusers had not been prosecuted because they feared she would talk to us.

What the hell is wrong with this country? There’s nothing more damning of a society than a failure to protect its children

Pull out of the World cup?

Stumbled across this whilst browsing the BBC this morning, discussing the possibility of players being poisoned...

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I wouldn't rule anything out with Russian.

Given that you can't guarantee the safety of the fans, the players or that it won't be corrupted in one way or the other, would you support the idea of England pulling out of the World Cup?

442

It has it's place, in fact Hodgson's use of it when we had no strikers available gained us more points than we could ever have hoped for. Problem is, I'm not certain we have the midfield to cope when other teams have pace or one more in the middle. Maybe if we signed that Amadou fella (strong and athletic) we'd have been more equipped for the job, but Milivojevic is way too slow and neither McArthur or Cabaye are big or fast enough. I think we play into other teams hands by not changing it up from time to time, particularly when we're away. We're too predictable for other managers to exploit, especially when we have limited options on the bench.

Switch to a 4231 or a 433 variation, with the players supposedly coming back, we look much stronger, not just because they are better players, but all of the team would be playing in the position they are most comfortable in rather than being shoehorned into a position just to play a preferred formation.

Cavalieri
AWB Tomkins Sackho PvA
Milivojevic Cabaye
Townsend RLC Zaha
Sorloth

Or

Cavalieri
AWB Tomkins Sackho PvA
Milivojevic
RLC Cabaye
Townsend Sorloth Zaha

Both of these give more potential game changers from the bench than we would with a 442. I'm not dead against it, just not all the time regardless of who and where we are playing. Wingbacks destroyed us yesterday with so much space and to top it off we were slow and swamped in centre midfield - we were completely exposed. Admittedly they do have some class players, but when you gift time and space to players of that quality (or even less) they will play much much better. In games like yesterday, with the players we had available, it's like playing with ten men.

For the rest of the season we need to be strong and play to our strengths and mixing it up from time to time will make us less predictable and get the very best out of the players we have.

There, got it out of my system :).

Chelsea FC are wankers - discuss

A club thats been horrible since at least the 70s, unpleasant owner. Fans are like a plague round Sutton, where I work. Ex captain Terry another piece of work. So I'm thinking wankers.

Tonight’s stabbing in Beckenham

Regardless of what’s happened it’s very sad to hear of a stabbing on your doorstop.

For those that want details, was outside Wimpy.

Team for Huddersfield

Must-win if you ask me, so your XI is...?

Mine would be:

Hennessey

Wan-Bissaka Tomkins Sakho PVA

Townsend Macca Luka Jairo Wilf

Sorloth

Benteke on the bench, he’s had his chances!

Player Ratings And Reviews: Chelsea (away)

Poll to follow

Trouble at West Ham

Seems as if it's going toxic there Atm.

Benteke Will score a hatrick today

Just got a feeling the floodgates will open for him today.


Ooooooh Christian Benteke.......

51 today.

Happy birthday Tariq, best wishes.

Londoner denied cancer care

What is this country coming to?

Are our fellow citizens to be treated like this:

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Shameful. He’s lived here for 44years.

~The Greatest Time Of Your Life.

Well....

Live Com and Updates: Chelsea v Crystal Palace KO 17.30 (BT sports)

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Chelsea away 93

Going to Chelsea tomorrow , last time I went to the Bridge was a 1 - 1 draw in 93 ( I think ) , David Whyte (RIP) scored and generally ran them ragged they brought on Tony Cascarino and the bugger scored in the 89th minute , it's the closest I've come to seeing us win at the Bridge ( my lads only 20 and he's seen us win there twice ) anyway looking forward to tomorrow , any memories of Chelsea away in the 80's or 90s ?

Best Foreign Language Films....

...the kind where subtitles don't bother you.

I'll start...

Ip Man.
I've never cared for martial arts films before but wow!
Great story and the fight scenes are out of this world.
Steer well clear of the sequels though.

Travel booking advice

I'm travelling to Victoria via Seattle on Virgin next month.

I chose Virgin because of the journey times. Had to fiddle about getting approval from my boss because the price kept changing, but in the end this was booked at confirmed.

I've just heard from our agency that Virgin have shifted the times leaving me with a 4 hour wait in Seattle on the way out (instead of two and a half hours) and a 7 hour wait in Seattle on the way back (instead of two and a half hours).

I'm told I'm entitled to a full refund, but that's no good at all because now the only improvement in travel time I can get is via BA whose flight (now, weeks later) costs twice as much.

Is there anything I can legitimately squeeze out of Virgin by way of compensation, or they completely clear to do this?

Happy birthday

Just another day but it’s nice to be rememberrd

Crystal Ball Chelsea away

Score, scorers and attendance please.

0-2
Willan, Hazard
41040

Rail seating

So seeing as palace are interested in rail/safe standing where and how much do you think we should install/need.
I'm going for 2 blocks nearest the holmesdale in the arthur and the back 10 rows in the holmesdale lower.
☺ think it would be very popular

Appollo GM and Jared Kushner

What's that all about then...

Press Conference Live: Pre-Chelsea Thursday 1:30pm

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Pubs for: Chelsea

Where is everyone drinking before the game then?

Lawyer/Solicitor help

Evening all, not the sort of thing I usually post on here but if anyone can be any assistance I would be grateful.

For confirmation this situation doesn't involve me personally but does affect someone close to me

Stopped by the police in an alley in Selsdon and arrested for possession and attempt to supply (cannabis)

There were no drugs on person but the other individual in the 'transaction' threw two pots of weed into a carrier bag put on the floor by the person I am interested in

Search of person revealed no drugs, search of their car the same. Then arrested and police searched residence where no evidence of drug paraphernalia was found.

The second person involved admitted possession and has a court date in two weeks

The other party denied all knowledge and was eventually released in the early hours, (investigations ongoing, not on bail)

Police confiscated both personal and their work mobiles. And advise hey are unlikely to be returned for at least 2 weeks

Person concerned was not and has never sold weed to anyone else (though they do smoke themselves)

Individual has an excellent job, and is terrified the Police are going to try to prosecute despite the complete lack of evidence.

They apparently suggested they were dealing because they had £60.00 on them (which they withdrew from Sainsburys cash point about 10 minutes before the arrest)

Anyone have any decent guidance? Happy for anyone to PM

Thanks in advance

Dave Vanian is in my office

Right now. Looking like Dave Vanian.
Sadly the Captain hasn't come.

Streaming

Am fairly illiterate when it comes to this sort of stuff, so was wondering what my best option would be to stream the odd away game?

Used to use an old laptop so wasn't bothered about any potential damage from pop-ups etc, but that's now dead as disco so I'd have to use my new MacBook and am not keen on exposing it to any danger.

All I want is to stream the odd away game that I can't make - not concerned with watching Sky or BT at other times, and likewise have no interest in streaming TV or movies.

Is there a simple, idiot-proof way without having to download software, sign up etc? Had a brief look through the Kodi thread and very little of it made much sense to me.

Cheers.

Basic Intruder Alarm System

I presently rent a small property and would like to installed a basic intruder alarm. One sensor in the lobby, an alarm and some kind of on and off device. Very simple and very basic. I guess it would be the kind or intruder alarm suitable for a room in halls or residence.

Has anyone got any recommendation?

Thanks in advance

Bye bye NME

shame, I started reading again when it became free

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Disability Living Allowance for children

Has anyone gone through applying for a DLA for children?

Our daughter was born with a disability and whilst it isn't major, it does have an impact on the family. We thought about applying for a DLA before but after getting the form and all the stuff it asked for, we didn't think it was worth it. The form is 60-odd pages!

However, we have to take time off for medical appointments most months, we have speech and language therapy appointments, we chose her nursery based on their ability to help better assess her learning progress... and all that adds pressure and stress, so we've looked at possibly applying now.

Palace vs spurs programme 25/2/18

Hi all,

Just wondered if anyone has a programme from the spurs game they are willing to sell me? My son was born on the 17th and in a bit of a family tradition we usually get the kids the programme from the first game after they were born had the game been as scheduled on the Monday night I would have attended and got one but couldn’t make the Sunday so missed out.
I’m happy to pay face value for it and postage as long as it’s in decent condition

Cheers

Free program to create videos online

Suggestions of programs to create videos and music online for sharing on FB and Insta Ta FC

Bournemouth Away &th April 2018

Tickets please.
A month today.

Match Updates: Champions league 6-7th of March

Think this’ll be comfortable for Real, but anticipating some good football nonetheless.

BMW 120i sport

My car got hit and the insurance are giving me a hire car which is worth about 20 times what my car is worth.

Anyone know what this car is like?

Suv

Due to circumstances I have too sell my Fiat Diablo work van and replace it with something I can use as a work vehicle and as a car. Have looked online and a small to medium Suv seems to fit the bill.

Anybody got one they can recommend or ones to avoid?

Where will the Tarquins drink pre-match on the 14/04/18?

After Clapham and Anerley which other far flung outpost will be next?
I am avoiding Coulsdon on the day just in case.

Boris threatens to withdraw England from world cup over Spy "illness"

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Lost Season Tocket x 2

Hi,

Somehow managed to lose not only my season ticket but also a friends who could not go last night!!! Must of been when we scored.

Main Stand
C Block
Back row if anyone has found.

A present will be within one of them for £20 for the finder!!

:wallbash:

Ancient alien weird history stuff!

How do you move a 300 tonne block?

Can we start Diego Cavalieri?

Does anyone know enough about this guy to judge whether or not he should be starting for us as soon as he's settled?

Looks like he has only ever had a significant run of games in Brazil but if he is competent we have to start him don't we? The Hennessey situation is really costing us...

The 51,801 Club

All BBSers who were there that day make yourself known.

1.


Should pass 60,000 in about seven years, I reckon.

Warning for those with young kids in Bromley area

INCIDENT OUTSIDE VALLEY PRIMARY SCHOOL ON 5TH MARCH 2018
We have been advised by Valley Primary School of an incident which took place on Beckenham Lane yesterday morning involving a member of the public and one of their Year 6 pupils.
The child reported that a man driving a blue car pulled alongside them asking that they get into the car; the pupil refused. The driver continued asking the same thing, then parked the car and got out. The child arrived safely at school.
The driver has been described as white, in his forties with brown hair and a beard.
The matter has been reported to the police but we encourage all parents and children to be extra vigilant on their journey to and from school.
If you see any suspicious activity in the vicinity of the school over the coming days, please do not hesitate to report to this the police.

Palace fan dies before game

RIP
just saw this on Twitter, saw him collapse just in front of me in the line for the programmes. Puts it all in perspective

Rakip and Jach

Again no faith in those two what so ever. Looking very much like they are simply not good enough, the management have completely jeopardized our future. While we should've been signing first teamers we sign two players who havent even played 1 game yet. The management have completely ruined us.:mad:

Suggested Team and Formation For: Chelsea away 10th march

:eek:

Player Ratings And Reviews: ratings vs utd

What a a game so many contenders

2-0...

And you ****ed it up! :hi:

Hope Man U play as dreadful against us in the cup.

Young man stabbed to death outside the Albert pub this afternoon

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I hope that this has nothing to do with either set of fans tonight?

Another sad waste of such a young life.

Russian Spy Shenanigans in Salisbury

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Police have declared a major incident.

Will/Should Roy drop Benteke poll.

The other thread needed a poll.

Shut up Bradley you are a cheating scumbag as is Mo

Both cheats .... Both cash driven drug takers.
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Live Com and Updates: Crystal Palace V Manchester United (20:00 KO SKY ME/PL)

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A plea to Roy for the game

Could we please have a Man city type performance that we produced against them on not a sterile sit back and hope, we need to press the ball and be quick out of the blocks I know it's a game were unlikely to win but let's at least put in a performance. Get the crowd going and show we are not going to be walked over

Crystal Ball 12 points and we stay up!

Been Anaylising the fixtures from the bottom 8 clubs all involved in this unique scrap.
Westbrom out the equation and gone so 6 clubs have 9 games and we have 10 with Utd tomorrow.

Swansea 39
WestHam 39
Huddersfield 39
Newcastle 39
Southampton 37
Stoke 36

All teams involved above have 3 MINIMUM winnable games so this would the MINIMUM total.

Basically 39 mark I believe would be fine as half (3) of these would atleastfinish under this mark also due also to halve the fixtures being played against each other.

So we need 12 points and the goal difference should be good and something we have to keep going.. next few games will lay basis of this.

ManU
Chelsea
Huddersfield
Liverpool
3POINTS NEEDED

Bouremouth
Brighton
3POINTS NEEDED

Watford
Leicester
3POINTS NEEDED

Stoke
WestBrom
3POINTS NEEDED

The above is possible if we stick to this minimum requirement, then I believe all will be good. Fingers crossed!